The worst thing about falling to pieces is that humans can do it so quietly.
I’m not the girl your mother warns you about. I won’t kiss your best friend or break your heart. I won’t make you choose between what you love to do & me. I’m not cold. I’m not reckless. I will love you more than anything. I will kiss you when you cry. I will stand by your side until you decide otherwise.
Rule #1: Never be #2.
You think ‘Okay, I get it, I’m prepared for the worst’, but you hold out that small hope, see, and that’s what fucks you up. That’s what kills you.
I don’t care that you got into drugs for three months straight, or how much sleep you lost in that period. I don’t care that you went home and fucked that person and woke up at 6am hating everything about yourself, or that you smoked so much you sounded as though your lungs were giving out.
You’re not a bad person for the ways you tried to kill your sadness.
You’re just human, and being human means you need to survive and you do so whichever way you deem fit, fuck everyone else.